Saturday, March 6, 2010

Saturday's Turkey = Me

So, I'm sitting here in front of my computer thinking about what to post today. Staring out the window, sun streaming in, warming me, rabbits meandering around the yard. I smile. I turn back to my computer, and to my horror (!) I can't see the screen. All I see is my reflection in the monitor. Because of the way the sun is laughingly shining in the window, all it highlights is my neck!

WHAT THE HELL? WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO MY NECK??? Oh yes, this is very special lighting that emphysises every loose piece of skin, every wrinkle, every wattle on my skinny little neck. Yes friends, it's horrifying. I turn my head from side to side, keeping a close eye on what happens to the skin on that neck. I stretch my head back, thinking that it will all smooth out. No. That's not what happens. The skin just stretches into long lines of wrinkles. I guess I could try wearing one of those cute little neck scarves, but I would always be imagining that people around me are whispering to each other, knowingly, about what was underneath the scarf. Or, even worse, the skin is so loose, what if I tied the skin up in the knot??? Ouch!


Now, truth be told, I knew I was getting a turkey neck, and I wasn't happy about it. I just try to not notice it. The only attention it gets is a bit of moisturizer one or two times a day. But now that it's been spotlighted for me by some cruel enlightenment of mother nature through my window, I believe I'll close the curtain.

Be sure to come back tomorrow for: "Who the hell's hand is that?!?" No. There will be no photos. :)

7 comments:

Heather said...

What? No photos?! Come on :)

I am absolutely sure that it's not as bad as you feel that it is but I enjoyed the humor in your post.

Anonymous said...

lol, I've had a gobbler for yrs, thats why I wear the gotee, it hides it;)

GB said...

I think you've dealt with the 'problem' you perceive very well. Humour is always good. Having said that I'll bet (and I'm not a lover of gambling) that it's more in your mind than it is in anyone else's. As I've got older I've realised how much less we look at the physical in people we know (TV personalities excluded of course!)and how much more we look at the whole person including the aura round their physicality. Rock on Lisa, as they say in NZ 'you'll be fine'.

Sarah Lulu said...

Oh dear that made me laugh and a I can so relate!!

GingerV said...

I don't pluck my eyebrows anymore - wanna know why? I have to look in one of those x10 mirros, oh my god what a shock. this is why nature reduces our eye sight so we can pretend we are still that woman of 20 or 30 years ago.... did you read my march 5 birthday blog.... take a moment....

septembermom said...

You read my mirror post this week. Still need to battle the gray. Maybe tomorrow...

Unknown said...

LOL how funny! OH and BTDT and I have found a great secret to never never take a side picture of yourself and when someone snaps a pic of you push your face forward as awkward as it feels, it won't show in the camera and WHAAAALAAAAA the gobbler doesn't show! LOL believe me...it works....LOL

Flora & Fauna

Books I have known & loved

  • Life of Pi
  • A Hundred Years of Solitude
  • Kite Runner
  • The Way the Crow Flies
  • Fall on Your Knees
  • Poisonwood Bible
  • East of Eden
  • Shantaram
  • I Know This Much is True

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